He loved his daddy, as he always called the man. Whether he was that little three year old boy or that sixty three year old son, his father was just his ‘ Daddy’. As he peered into the nursing home room at that emaciated figure, once so broad and full of energy, now reduced to but a skeleton… sleeping on his side. He could barely stand by the bed, as the river of tears flowed so easily from his reddened eyes. Thank God his daddy was not awake, as he slipped out of the room and out of that sad place, where so many await death.

HIs mother bade her goodbyes to the world not even a year before. The 89 year old woman had contracted gangrene on her leg and was rushed to the hospital. The surgeon called him one evening to explain what needed to be done to ‘ Save your mother… perhaps’. He was told that not only the lower part of her leg had to go, but even the other one too, as the disease had already continued its attack. He, the son, had the power of attorney and had to decide. What could he do? He had visited her that afternoon and she was in pain, intense pain despite the morphine they pushed into her. He told the surgeon that he needed to go and speak with her first. The next day he visited her and told her that ” I know a way to stop your pain Mom.” He then told her that they had to do the thing to both her lower legs… if she wanted. She said ‘ Yes’, anything to ease her pain. He went home, called the surgeon and gave his approval… and she died during the surgery.

His wife and him, after the phone call, rushed right to the nursing home. His father was sitting in a wheelchair in the lobby, as if awaiting the fateful news. When he informed his daddy that she was gone the man literally began to sob uncontrollably. This was the first time in his 54 years of existence that he ever saw his father cry. His wife, who loved his father more than she did her own father, hugged him for seemed an eternity as he held the poor man’s hand like a little child does. The man had been with this woman, through all their many years of a tumultuous 64 year marriage, and was tied to her psychically. Her ending became the preface to his own demise.

It wasn’t much long after that for his father to have hospice within the nursing home. The women who visited were a real blessing. Yet, the old man had already given up and was losing all that one would lose when choosing to say goodbye to this realm. He remembered the last visit he made to the nursing home before it was over. Once again, his father was lying asleep when he entered the room. It didn’t even resemble his daddy anymore. Wiping away the flood of tears he leaned over, took one of the pillows and … placed it back as he hurried out.

They shoot horses don’t they?

PA Farruggio
July, 2023