When I just notified one of my oldest friends, Joe, he said it best: “There is no death. It’s a transition.” At 7:01 AM this morning my best friend, intimate and business partner, Stacy Lynn, transitioned. We knew that this was approaching, more intensely this past week as she was failing quickly. I had gone to see her a few times each day at the most wonderful place for her, the Hospice Care Center. She got the best 24/7 care and attention by a myriad of nurses, aides, and practitioners. Stacy felt very much at ease despite the horrific pain in her bones from the Big C. I was her caregiver for over seven months until Hospice took her under their wings a month ago. But the story is not just about that. It is mystical.
Last night I could not sleep. I just knew something was up. I called the care center, as I always did early each AM and late each night, and they said she was resting. I told the nurse to go into her room and whisper to Stacy that “Philip loves you and will be here tomorrow morning.” By three AM I floundered in my bed for what seemed an eternity. Finally, at 5 AM I got up, fed the kitties their usual early morning treats, did my stretching and took my herbs and had a brief breakfast. By 6:30 I called the care center and told the nurse I was on my way, and please tell Stacy I am coming now. When I was buzzed into the place I hurriedly flew down the hallway to her room. Her night nurse shook her head as I asked “Is she dead?” and answered, “Not yet, but very soon. Go on in.”
Being my MO I whisked in saying loudly “Philip is here to see my girl” and sat on the chair by her bed. She had her eyes half open and the feel of her hand was ice cold. I took out this old picture of us standing in winter jackets over 30 years ago, and put it right by her eyes. I told her how beautiful she was in that photo and how much I loved her… forever! Then I said to her what I have been saying to her for some time now: ” You are going to a beautiful and peaceful place, and the Divine Mother is with you to comfort and protect you on your journey. Please don’t forget that you promised to watch over me and the kitties and your daughter and sister. Don’t forget!” She opened her mouth a bit as I reached down and kissed her hand and then her forehead, and … She was gone. This all happened as I was on the phone with her sister Helen, who had planned to drive up from 4 hours away to see her ‘Big Sis’. We both cried as the nurse came over and said, “She waited for you before she would go. She was waiting after I told her you were on your way.”
There is always a caveat to each story. This is it: When I was getting ready to pack a few things Helen asked me to bring over, like a photo display of her with her daughter and sister and the kitties and doggies she loved, I remembered the photo I just mentioned. It was on a magnet on the side of the refrigerator in a plastic holder. I went to slide it off and it fell… straight down between the cabinets and the refrigerator. There was no room to reach down for it. so I had to pull out the refrigerator to make some room. I did that but there was still no way to retrieve it. Then a thought. Stacy had a cane that she needed for walking months ago when the Big C and treatments had made her so weak. I ran to the office and took it to the kitchen. I was able to lean over the cabinets and use it to push the picture out. I had not thought of that cane since she had to switch to a walker two months ago. Coincidence? No. The proof is how she reacted to that picture by her bedside, right before she passed. God, I do love her so!!
Death does not end a relationship.
PA Farruggio
April 19th 2026